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Writer's pictureKarl Avdek

CONFIDENCE IN THE ABILITY TO CHANGE VS. “I CAN’T!!!” PART 2.

Updated: Oct 31, 2021


ARE YOU CONFIDENT IN YOUR ABILITY TO CHANGE?


ARE YOU CONFIDENT YOU CAN MAKE ADJUSTMENTS AND MAKE THINGS BETTER OR DO YOU FIND YOURSELF AND OTHERS AROUND YOU SAYING, "I CAN'T?"

How frustrating is it to hear the words, “I can’t” from a child; a youngster you are coaching or working with; perhaps even your own son or daughter.

You feel anger, frustration, perhaps even guilt. (Did you convey your coaching information; your words of instruction or encouragement incorrectly?)

HOW INADEQUATE DO YOU FEEL WHEN YOU HEAR YOURSELF UTTER THOSE WORDS.

Take heart. The words “I can’t” do not apply. There is no reality to “… can’t.” There is no "I can't change!!!"

"If you are a player or parent or coach struggling with a performance issue such as "making a change" for your own or your team's better performance or a coaching/teaching or even a “relationship” issue between players and coaches and parents that just isn't responding to instruction and hard work, then call me now and let's fix it. I've got a systematic process that takes care of any interference you have to the ultimate performance potential that you have seen short bursts of...and want to see it show up consistently! I work with clients all over the world by using video and ZOOM over the internet!!!

Actually the “process of change” is very simple and despite the words of refusal you may be hearing (or saying) your brain is actually "wired" to change. It's in the software.


Several years ago NASA conducted an experiment in order to determine what effect living in a weightless environment would have on astronauts . In order to test the astronauts ability to “adapt” NASA fit the astronauts with goggles that FLIPPED their field of vision to a point where it was literally UPSIDE DOWN.

Not only did the astronauts adapt their movements to their new environment but astonishingly, within 30 days their VISION changed. Their eyes ADAPTED to the goggles and they saw RIGHT SIDE UP again; even with the goggles in place.

How was that possible?

The astronauts brains “adapted” to the new input of information they were receiving by creating NEW NEURAL PATHWAYS” which could REINTERPRET the new information and, in sequence, communicate to the body on how to USE the “new” information correctly.

Okay you ask, so what is a neural pathway and more importantly, “how do I get one? For myself? For my son or daughter? And where? Is there an aisle at the sporting goods store? Who makes them? Nike? Adidas? Is there a team discount?" Could I find one on Ebay?

Not exactly. You don't need to go GET one. You already have it ... INSIDE yourself and ... it is actually fairly simple to use. It is simple to enact change. The procedure of change can be described as follows: INPUT NEW INFORMATION. REPEAT. REPEAT UNTIL NEW HABIT FORMED!!!

We want to create NEW HABITS. In very simple terms forming new “habits” within our mind can be likened to cutting a new pathway through the woods. In fact, for dramatic purpose, let’s say it’s not the woods but a JUNGLE of dense overgrowth.

So … you are out on a two week camping trip in the jungle and about twenty yards from your campsite you discover a fresh water stream with a huge number of very edible fish.

Yum!!! We know what we’re having for dinner for the next two weeks … fresh fish!!!

The problem is that, although there is a path leading away from the campsite out of the jungle, that path leads AWAY from the stream. Not even close. Opposite direction.

Uh, so … how do we get to the stream? And the fish?

Easy. We have to hack a path to the stream through the jungle.

We grab our machetes and head out.

The first day it takes about three hours to get through all the overgrowth but we make it to the stream, we fish for an hour and … dinner is served.

The next day we take along the same long knives and hack away again to get to the fish and the stream only this time the “hacking” process takes … a half hour.

The third day we don’t even bring the machetes. We stroll down to the stream and fish as easily as if we were walking down Fifth Ave.

By the end of our two week camping trip not only can we drive a tank through the path to the stream but the other path … the path leading away from the camp?

It is overgrown and fast getting swallowed by the jungle. We can't get five feet into it without being grabbed at and raked by brush and branches.

The old path is impassable.

Our nerves work the same way. In fact there is an applicable phrase in science, “The nerves that fire together, wire together.”

When we have a new image; specifically when we … let’s use the word: “input” (yes like a computer) a new piece of information that presents itself to our conscious and subconscious mind our minds treat it as one would expect … our mind is baffled; uncomfortable, unfamiliar, hesitant, probably even clumsy and confused.

However … as that process is REPEATED; as that electrical impulse travels across the “space” between the neurons the “new” information gets “wired” in. The space between the neurons gets smaller and the connection between them becomes stronger and stronger.

How does this work in our sport?

Let’s say it’s golf. Let’s say that as a golfer, you struggle with the short game.

“I have no short game,” you REPEAT over and over to your friends; your golf partners and BTW: this can obviously be used for ANYTHING. I can’t hit the curveball. I can’t shoot the basketball. I can’t get my homework done on time. I can’t “get” math/science/history … whatever. I can’t get a date to the prom. I can’t get a raise. Etc., etc., etc.

Are you surprised when you don’t PERFORM well with your short game out on the golf course? You shouldn’t be. In fact how COULD you perform? You have literally TOLD your body NOT to perform. You have INSTRUCTED and even COMMANDED your body to perform badly.

One day, fed up with your performance AND your short game (and maybe just a little bit fed up with our yown attitude) you decide to begin to WORK on this part of your game and you even start to get a little better … bit by bit and guess what … your mind starts TALKING differently. At first it may be small; “Oh, I’m getting a little better at this.”

“Gosh that was EAS ... IER.” Etc.

Swoosh!!! Hack!!! Snap!!! (Sound of a machete hacking away)!!!

Ooops! There goes some of that growth on the way to the stream.

Not surprisingly you CONTINUE to get better. Bit by bit. Electrical impulse by electrical impulse; one after another across that synapse until one day …

Swoosh again!!! Hack!!! Snap!!!

More machete sounds until finally … ZING!!! Snap!!! Crackle!!! Pop!!! (Electrical sounds) That electrical bond has suddenly gotten wired together you notice that, “Hey I’ve actually become pretty good at my short game.”

And the odd thing is that you assume that it happened instantaneously and it did … but that instant was the culmination of the PROCESS!!!

You have CHANGED your minds. You have changed your actions because of our minds and in turn of course CHANGED OUR GAME.

DO NOT ACCEPT FINALITY into your life or your performance in any area of your life. Do not accept "can't."

Change is waiting for you to PERORM it. What’s the phrase from Nike?

Oh yeah … JUST DO IT!!! Baby steps. Small phrases. One foot in front of the other. A little at a time.

The process works when we work the process.

Sometimes it is difficult to ask for help.

All of us could improve something with our mental approach to our game. Sometimes we need help but don’t know who to ask … or how. Contact me and I can explain my sports mental toughness programs and you can learn how to quickly and easily improve your mental game.

I work with athletes and their families from all over the world using ZOOM over the internet!!!

CLICK HERE FOR FREE CONSULTATION (203) 252-0395

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